Bravery

For a few weeks I've been mulling over the word Brave.  Bravery.  Courage.  Guts.  What do these things look like and where to do they come from?

I watched Band of Brothers (for the 4th time, I think) recently and all I could think was, "There are bullets everywhere; how do they keep on running forwards? Why not hide or scream or retreat?"  What is it that those men, many really just boys, had to give them courage to fight?  With the benefit of hindsight, we can see what an evil they were fighting, but certainly E Company had no knowledge of concentration camps until they stumbled upon one in the woods.  Is it the training, mixed with the camaraderie of knowing you have to keep your buddies alive?  Is it some sort of animal instinct to survive, even if that means entering danger and killing others?

Then I've been reading the Hunger Games.  All 3 books in about 5 days.  On the outside, Katniss seems so brave, but her thoughts confess to confusion, doubt, fear, anger.  In a web of games that she has been caught in, she is trying to play her hand in the way that best protects those she loves.  Is she brave?

To my mind, the Hunger Games is a brutally accurate social commentary.  It's fairly obvious, but let's just spell it out: we are 'The Capitol', extorting food from poorer regions, making those regions our effective slaves, lavishing ourselves with clothes, food, luxuries we don't need whilst others walk in bare feet and with empty stomachs.  In the book, it's so easy to hate the Capitol, not only for the obvious horror of the Games themselves, but for the 'background' horror of greed, self-centredness, vanity and disengagement shown by the people there.  How many of them care that someone else might need just one roll, when they are throwing up a whole meal in order to gorge on more food?  How many of us care that the £2 we spend on chocolate each week could probably feed a small family for a week, elsewhere in the world?

So maybe there's a different level of bravery.  It comes from the same place but it's Low Level.  Not so obvious, but just as important.

It's a bravery that says, "Actually, I don't care if my clothes aren't the newest fashion, because that £20 jumper will be nice, but £20 for medical supplies is money better spent."  Courage says, "I'm going to care less about me and my looks and my food and my hobbies and my problems - and care more about the 12.5% of the world who'll go to bed hungry tonight."  Guts says, "I want to live a different life.  One that doesn't end up like The Capitol but ends up like the Kingdom of God.  Generosity, kindness, humility, engagement."

Sounds a lot like Jesus - generous enough to give his own life; kind enough to engage with everyone, whoever they were, to teach, to heal, to forgive; humble enough to be born as a helpless baby; definitely engaged with the world, and with its people, and with their future.  And absolutely, brave.

The Beggar and the King

The first Sunday in Advent has been and gone, and I have missed my chance to sing 'O Come O Come Emmanuel' for another year.  But, on the theme of Emmanuel, God with us, I want to share a poem - The Beggar and the King.

I am not a poet.  I've never been much of a creative writer.  But I wrote this almost without stopping.  Given that it was written in a prayer room, the idea of 'divine inspiration' can't be too far off.  Certainly my previous attempts at poetry would confirm that, on my own, I am not the next Robert Browning.  Or the next anyone.

That's my disclaimer.  Now enjoy the poem...

He stumbles.

He falls into the gritty, dirty snow and ice,

his bare feet blue with cold and red with blood.

His burden falls from his back,

and is soaked in grime and slush.

As he pushes himself up,

his naked arms quiver and tremble –

there is no strength in them now.

He cries out in frustration,

a wild call of a desperate man,

a fractured call of a failed man.

He stops trying to get up.

He just lies, face down in the snow and ice and grit.

He gives in to it.

Then…footsteps –

strong, sturdy, confident steps,

coming closer, closer…

He sees the boots –

strong, sturdy boots of a rich man.

Then he sees a hand, stretched down to him.

With his last strength he lifts his skinny, weary arm

to the rich man.

Immediately, he is pulled to his feet,

as easily as a father lifts his little child.

Now he sees:

The boots are met at the knee by thick trousers,

a warm cloak covers layers of fine cloth,

a scarf wraps round the neck,

a cap on the head,

but warmest of all

is the Face of the King.

For this must be the King.  He knows it is true.

But the King takes of his hat, his scarf…

Is he too hot?  No, he starts to shiver.

But he doesn’t stop-

now he takes off the cloak,

the fine cloth layers,

even his trousers,

and the boots.

The Beggar stands shivering with the King.

They are not so different now –

barefoot in the snow.

“My clothes are for you.  Put them on.”

The Beggar looks at the King,

shivering in his undergarments,

fingers already blue-tinted,

teeth chattering.

“My clothes are for you.  Put them on.”

The Beggar cannot feel his feet.

He grabs those study boots and pulls them on.

Feeling the warmth return to his toes,

his appetite is wetted…

He pulls the trousers over,

slips the fine cloth over his arms,

wraps the cloak around his body,

then the scarf,

then the hat.

He can feel the blood running warm through his veins.

His strength is returning.

In the corner of his eye he glimpses the King,

still standing barefoot, trembling,

and now carrying the Beggar’s burden.

And the Beggar, robed like a King,

kneels down,

and bows,

and weeps with gratitude

before the humbled king, robed like a Beggar.

Fairtrade, Second Hand, Handmade.

This year I've set myself the challenge that all our Christmas gifts must be fairtrade, second hand or handmade.

Unfortunately, I had failed even before I'd made the decision, having bought 3 particularly commercial gifts for certain members of the families.  But, since then, I've done amazingly well.

Normally our Christmas shop consists of a drive to Bluewater, 3-4 hours of traipsing round shops whilst Chris watches a movie (he's not a bad husband, trust me, it's better shopping without him!) then he comes and takes the bags to the car each time I feel like my arms are going to fall off.  This shopping trip is tiring, stressful and costly - and never covers everyone.  There's always the last minute Amazon order, paying £20 to have it delivered right now please.

So, part of the reason for choosing to shop differently is to save myself from Bluewater insanity.
There's also some fairly good ethical reasons, but you already know what they are.

Thus far, I haven't made anything else, apart from the hat (see previous post) - and even that is only almost done, 3 weeks later...

I haven't got anything fairtrade yet, but I'm waiting for our church to have its Fairtrade Fayre in a couple of weeks.  And since I organised all the stalls I can be fairly confident that they'll give me a very good choice of gifts to buy.  If you're in Lewes, find us on facebook (Fairtrade Fayre at Southover Church) and come along!

What has been brilliant so far is the second hand stuff.  I've made an effort to only shop when I'm relaxed and not in a hurry, to get as far away from the Bluewater experience as possible.  First charity shop was Oxfam.  The haul was immense.  Spent quite a bit of money but got so many beautiful things: notebooks made from old wrapping paper, fairtrade soaps shaped like hearts, little finger puppets, a gorgeous purse.... and the list goes on.

My great start didn't continue so well as I ventured around more Lewes charity shops; I think I really started at the top of the pile!  But I found a lovely vase in my mother-in-law's favourite colour, a book that I think my nephew will love, some hankies, and then a funny little book about ancient cathedrals - destined for the in-laws too.

Most exciting of all was Jamie's booksale.  Jamie sells books.  I don't actually know his job title, but he's the one that publishers send books to, and he shows books to shops, they decide, business is done etc.  Anyway, he gets sent these samples - so many that every so often he holds a booksale, just to get rid of them!  Books are 75% off the retail price...!  This time the sale was in aid of our lovely friends John & Fritha and their work with orphans in Ukraine.  Bonus :-)

So, all in all a great start to the fairtrade/secondhand/handmade Christmas.  It remains to be seen whether I'll actually be able to find something, say, for my Dad - typically hard to buy for as all dads are.  Amazon still might be called upon on 23 December.

And of course, if any of the family sees this, they'll now know that we're not as generous as we seem...  Although if I get round to enough baking, they might not mind ;-)

Messenger Bag Tutorial - How to make a messenger bag

First time you've made a bag like this?  This tutorial is for you!  Having made several other types of bag before, this was my first time making a messenger bag, so hopefully my steps will be easy to follow - and I won't use sewing jargon and assume you know how (e.g.) sew in a zip...  Plus, you can learn from my mistakes :-)

1. Buy your fabric!

You'll need:

1m of 'outer' fabric - something strong.  I used oilcloth but thick linen or denim would work too.

1.5m of 'inner' fabric (you probably won't use it all, but better to have leftovers than not enough) - I used calico for my lining but you can use anything that'll stand up for having stuff chucked in and dug out every day!

2 zips - one for the inner pocket, one for the 'security' zip

Bias binding or ribbon or webbing for Edging

Webbing for strap

Strap adjustor set (see link below)

2. Cut fabric to size :-)

 I'd recommend creating your own template for your bag, as everyone will want their bag to be a slightly different size.  Check against another bag to make sure this new one will be the size you're aiming for!

To avoid extra sewing, cut the fabric into the shape of the template below.  Use the pattern of the fabric (if there is one) to help you cut straight!

 Remember when making your template, to leave extra room for seams. There aren't that many with this shape of template, but have a look at the finished product to see where you'll need a tiny bit more give.

I have my father's engineering genes, so my projects usually start off with a scribble like this i.e. a plan of action!  If you know what special features you want your bag to have, you can plan them into the making process, rather than fiddly adding them too late...

Making a drawing like this also reminds you of what you've forgotten - I almost forgot the Strap! :-)

3. Pockets

 For me, this was the fiddliest part of the making process.  I'm not sure this is the 'approved' way to make pockets, but it worked!  This way, the bulk of the pocket sticks into the bag, rather than out - thus, the bag doesn't bulge out where the pocket is.

So, cut a rectangle of fabric, fold the edges under to make a seam.
Then sew the zip onto the top edge of the fabric - at each end, turn the fabric at right angles around the edges of the zip - this creates a 3D shape.  [It's easiest to sew in zips when they're undone - and make sure you move the zip pull, so it doesn't suddenly knock your sewing machine needle in the wrong direction!]
For the bottom corners, you can either leave them be, and have a flatter pocket, or you can fold the corners in on themselves to create more of this 3D shape*.

 This inner pocket is then sewn directly onto the lining fabric - so, you'll sew 3 sides of fabric, then sew the free side of the zip at the top.  (This is why I used a transparent zip, looks neater)
My other two pockets were formed in a similar way: edge the fabric, create the 3D shape, sew directly onto the outer fabric - trying not to copy my skew-wiff sewing of the longer pocket!

*Fold rightside edges onto each other, as if you were making a triangle with the fabric.  Sew a tiny seam at right angles to the edge.  You should now have a tiny triangle of fabric that you can chop off if you like.  Turn this little seam out and you'll have made your rectangle 3D.

4. Combine Outer & Inner

Once you're sure that you've got all the extra bits you want - in my case, all 3 pockets, sew the outer and inner fabrics together.
At this point, it's so easy for the fabric to go skew-wiff!  Make sure it's well pinned together - or pegged together, in my case, as oilcloth is so thick pin pricks make quite obvious marks.

 Time to do the edging.  What did I learn?  Use large webbing!!  Although mine looks very neat and beautiful, it was a pig to get right, and probably took the longest time for the smallest detail!
If you're not using bias binding, which goes round corners easily, make sure you sew in one direction right up to the corners, then re-direct the sewing machine and the webbing/ribbon.

 5. Strap hooks & Security Zip

These are maybe the fussiest bits of the make.  Not complicated, just small, in the case of the strap 'hooks', and needing to be precise, in the case of the security zip.

I struggled to find brass strap hooks and adjustors - most places just had plastic ones - not very classy!  I eventually found this great shop on etsy that sells them at a very good price:

http://www.etsy.com/listing/78392410/1-12-bag-slider-strap-adjuster-antique

The strap hooks then just consist of a little piece of outer fabric, strengthened with the same length of webbing, then attached to the top of the bag sides.

 This photo shows my bits and pieces as I tried to make the security zip and fabric, at just the right size.  Best to make up the bag (see below) then measure to find the exact size.
To sew in the zip: cut one line down the centre of the fabric, the length of the zip.  On each side of this line, fold the fabric back a tiny way, to edge it.  You can then 'wrap' the fabric around the zip to sew it on - the zip itself will 'seal' the end of the fabric that you've just cut in half.

6. Making up

 Now comes the fun part!
I'd suggest you sew the edges of the bag first i.e. the bottom and sides of the 'sides' :-) so you've actually got a bag shape.
Then add the webbing/ribbon/binding to those edges.  There should now be no unedged edges seen - make sense?!
Next, sew in the security fabric - be careful at this point that you don't sew two sides of the bag together.  Yes, I might have done this by mistake...

 Now the strap:
Measure against your favourite bag to see how much length you'll need.
Fold back the very end of the webbing to make a good edge.
Feed the webbing through one strap hook, then through the middle bar of the strap adjustor.  Sew webbing together to form a loop with this bar 'trapped' inside!
Feed the other end of the strap through the main part of the strap adjustor, just like a belt.  Then loop it through the other strap hook (the one on the other side of the bag :-) )  Sew the end of the strap to itself.

7. Ta-Dah!

Enjoy your bag!

One word of advice - test out your homemade bag somewhere close to home, where it doesn't matter if things fall out 'cos you're not carrying your passport. I first used mine at Universal Studios, California, thousands of miles from home, and suddenly realised there was a hole (sew the sides, then add the webbing, people!) - thankfully nothing fell out on the rollercoasters :-)

Christmas in the Making

I've just spent five minutes gazing around my living room, looking for inspiration for my very first blog post.  "First Blog Post" seemed a bit obvious.  "Searching for Peace" seemed a little philosophical for post #1.  "The Creative Life" seemed, well, just a bit poncy.  (Is that how to spell poncy?!)  Probably best to just tell you about what I'm making at the moment, and let the words flow from there...

I've started the Christmas Making.  It's only October, but my sister pointed out last weekend that it's only a matter of weeks (8 - I just counted and now feel slightly panicked) until the Big Day.  My birthday, in fact.  A source of much joy at huge heaps of presents when I was a child.  Now, more like a source of frustration - because at my in-laws house I don't want the day to be about me, it should be about their family traditions (even if these consist of endless games which I hate to lose but invariably do) - and because at my family's house it should be about the kiddies.

And now I've just made this post about my birthday rather than about Christmas.  
Can't help it.

Back to Christmas.  Said sister asked if I had been planning to make anything for her little one, and suggested I make a bigger version of a hat I'd given her a couple of years ago.  At the time I thought the hat was quite stretchy - apparently children grow quite fast...  Anyway, this is my first Christmas Make - the simplest hat possible, because you basically knit a long rectangle, fold it in half and sew the seams, and Hey Presto! you have some CUTE little ears.  Little niece is going to look GORGEOUS!
[Find a version of the hat here https://www.etsy.com/listing/96076630/childs-blue-knitted-hat-with-ears but imagine it even cuter with little tassles on the ears :-)]

The beginning of Christmas Making period has reminded me of how darned slow knitting is.  Especially in moss stitch.  Worth it for the lovely bobbly effect but I'm waiting eagerly for the lovely stocking stitch which grows an inch or two every time I sit down to watch TV.

It has also reminded me that I should probably think about what else I'm going to make for relatives and friends (if they're lucky!).  Suggestions?  :-)  I was contemplating whether or not I could come up with a present for everyone that is: easy enough to make without buying the entire Stitchery and spending the whole of November sewing; quality enough that recipients will actually enjoy the gift rather than smile on 25th then quietly tuck it under the bed on the 26th; and cheap enough to make Making Christmas gifts financially worthwhile.  

Unfortunately, I was pondering this whilst trying to get to sleep and sleep won.  Things will probably end up like last year with a bit of a mishmash of Made and Bought and Ali sewing 'til 10.30pm on Christmas Eve before rushing out to Midnight Communion.  

Can't wait for Christmas...